Note: This is the first part of an ongoing series of talks called "Empowering Yourself, Empower Others".

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To break the ice and help us warm up as the event begins, we watched a short film called The Burrow, which was a really cute but meaningful representation of mentorship.

Of course, we had to discuss what a mentor meant to us and what they can help us with. The word "guide/guidance" appeared several times here, which suggests how mentors act almost similar to coaches and teachers or friends but probably with a more professional approach.

Despite being an online event, it was still completely interactive, with us breaking into smaller breakout rooms in Zoom to discuss things such as our own experiences with mentorship and simulating a scenario about approaching someone to become a mentor and then getting feedback on that.

There was also a part of the session where we can ask questions to the host

The following are some of the learnings I was able to get from the talk.

Why do we need mentors?

Purpose:

• career

• personal development

• specific skills or tasks (e.g. hobbies)

Timeline:

• short term - until you reach a certain goal

• long term - extends over to a longer period

Types of Mentors

1. The master of the craft - someone who is the best in their field; i.e. the role model

2. The copilot - someone you work closely with, to cheer you along the way

3. The champion of your cause - speaks well about you, helping and supporting you connect to your next career or personal development opportunity; helps expand your network

4. The reverse mentor - Someone you mentor, who you can check on about how you impact them

5. The anchor - someone outside of your work with that you can share the things you have in mind

Considerations

Some things to consider when looking for a mentor:

1. Take initiative - don't hesitate too much. simply ask for someone's help

2. Respect others' time - the mentor is taking out a time of their day to help you out, so be considerate and be respectful of each others' time.

3. Willingness - you should both be willing to commit to this task

What does a mentor-mentee relationship look like?

1. Meet and Greet - the phase of getting to know each other. It's important to discuss the following questions:

   a. How can the mentor help you?

   b. What parts of their experiences could help you?

   c. How can you both commit?

   d. If the mentor's experiences don't match with what you need, can they recommend you to someone else instead?

2. Figure out a plan - define goals and how you will keep in touch. This is a more specific approach on how

   a. what are the goals?

   b. virtual or in-person?

   c. how many times per week? per month?

   d. when does the mentorship end? (based on resources, schedule, etc.). no hard deadlines are needed

3. Feedback - how will you provide constant feedback to each other?

   a. What works?

   b. what didn't work too well?

What not to do?

Here are some things that you shouldn't do as a mentor or as a mentee:

As a mentor

• assess the mentee's needs

• provide false promises or expectations

• can't commit or follow through

• get emotional or annoyed when the mentee doesn't follow your suggestions

• not respectful of ethical and cultural boundaries

As a mentee

• ask for mentorship and have no follow-up (i.e. ghosting the mentor)

• ask mentors to work for you. figure out a meetup time and place, set the meetings, and figure out what you need from the mentor first.

• take up more of their time than what you initially agreed, like being late for meetings

How to find mentors?

• corporations - mentor-mentee programs in your own company

• Linked In - message them and set up a coffee meetup session with them

• Conferences

• Workshops

• Meetings

• Online Platforms - e.g. ADPlist

• Referrals - referrals from someone you know

• Career Books - getting inspiration from a book

• SNS

Key Takeaways

When approaching a mentor,

1. Find key points to connect

2. Don't be too aggressive/assertive

3. Reflect on how you think they can help you

4. Narrow down your focus

5. Keep using professional channels to contact each other and set your boundaries

6. Having a script/template helps with communication

7. Consider the question, "How did <mentor> overcome some issues <mentee> encountered/are encountering?"

8. It's important to see if you are a match, not only industry-wise but personality-wise as well.

9. Don't take things personally. As Ann Kilzer of WWCode Tokyo said, "And a rejection might also mean the person is busy. Even if you do all the right stuff. So don’t take it personally"

References:

https://ideas.ted.com/the-5-types-of-mentors-you-need-in-your-life

WWC Tokyo Event